It's not been a good day today!! I have been dealing with fibro flare-ups, people disappointing me, my crazy family, as in sister, hurting spiritually, emotionally, and physically!! I am going to let myself have one more pity party and then that's it!! No more negativity in my life!!!! Life is too short to feel this way! I want my life to represent the Joy of Christ and the way that I have felt the last couple of days sure hasn't been like that! Somebody might even question if I was truly a Christian, gosh I might even question it! But I know in my heart of hearts that I am!! That is the one thing that I am sure of! That and that I have an awesome husband, and kids!! They are my treasures!
If you live in this household, you know where you stand with each other, even if it hurts your feelings! That is the way Dewayne has always been, and he has passed it down to all of our children!! Me, I wear my feelings on my sleeve, so I get hurt a lot, but I am learning!! If you don't want the answer, don't ask the question!! LOL!
So from now on, there is only positive things, if it's not positive, it's out of here!! If you can't say something positive, shut your mouth! If it's going to bring me down, don't want it!! We are not wealthy as far as money goes, but when it comes to love and friendship, I would say we were millionaires!! We stick together, come hell or high water, we are there for each other! I married my soul mate, the man of my dreams, my knight and shining armor, MY HERO!!! And then we had three amazing children, each who are gifted in different ways, each who are so much like their daddy that sometimes it's scary, but I wouldn't have it any other way! Then we were blessed with an amazing son-in-law, who thinks my daughter is the best thing in his life!! I love Heath like he was my own child and praise God for him!
Each day is a new beginning, a new start, a new day to be a blessing to my Heavenly Father and to others!! That is my goal, that is why I was put here on earth for! Many times I feel inferior to others, like I am not a good enough person, and I put a wall up! I deal with jealousy and discontentment!! I see others that have more STUFF than we have, who seem not to struggle with paying their bills, and I wonder why we have it so hard sometimes! Then Dewayne reminds me of all the medical bills that we have had to pay out, and then I am amazed that this man has stuck with me through all of my illnesses and surgeries, and I feel very humbled and blessed! Who needs STUFF when I have Dewayne? I wouldn't trade him for anything in this world!! He is my rock that keeps me grounded! I realize how much he has taught me, how he has made me a better person!!
This is my journey, I realize that everything that I have been through in life has brought me more peace. I think of one my favorite verses: Philippians 4:7, And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall KEEP your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus!!!
Only God can bring me true peace, so if I do the things that Philipians 4:8&9 says I can only stay positive, and those things are: Finally brethen, whatsover things are true, whatsover things are honest, whatsover things are just, whatsover things are pure, whatsover things are lovely, whatsover things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you!
Verse 11 says: Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsover state I am, therewith to be content. 12: I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and the be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. 13: I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHICH STRENGTHENETH ME!!!! This is what I am learning!! It's not easy, but there is no greater gift than peace and contentment!!
Thank you to my family, my friends and most especially to God for allowing me to be me! I love you all!!
You are so much stronger than you know. Your faith through it all has encouraged so many others at times you aren't even aware of. Lynn, you are you and who God made you to be. You are blessed and a highly favored daughter of the King! I've seen the resemblance to you "dad" and I'm sure others have too! Stay the course! And forget the "stuff". Your blessings come in the way of people and relationships and love and that is way better than them coming in the way of large empty houses, fancy cars and alot of "stuff" that is here today and will be burned up tomorrow! Enjoy and smile! You are a most perfect and beautiful "you"! :-)
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